ARE WOMEN EXPENDABLE & REPLACEABLE? ARE WE JUST SEX OBJECTS UNTIL WE'RE 25?

DOMESTIC ABUSE AND THE AMERICAN WOMAN

Are women expendable and repaceable? Are we just sex objects until we're 25, and then considered over-the-hill and useless? I have spent years mentoring teenage boys and girls, and this seems to be the prevailing viewpoint; this is what they are telling me.

A 7th grade girl at my kids' school was caught in the boys' room performing a sexual act on an 8th grade boy. A gifted young Indian girl has decided to become sexually active because she doesn't think she's pretty (or blonde!) enough to get a boyfriend. All the preteens I know are obsessed with sex, and using language that makes me faint. These kids are aspiring to become lap dancers. When did pole-dancing become a degree-requiring profession! Sex, sex and more sex - this is the prevailing value in our culture these days. Thanks to Kim Kardashian and TMZ! Actually  we must thank MTV and advertising. My motto is: All human suffering is caused by Victoria's Secret! 

That's why I'm trying to become a virgin again in more ways than one. How can you find your soul in a pornographic world? I tell these girls that mystery is appealing; that keeping your clothes on is provocative. We don't need to create any more men of entitlement. There is already an army of men cheating on their wives and using women like paper towels, as Tiger Woods did.

In our culture it seems that women are being sexually objectified more than ever. I am a product of the 80's, and as a sex symbol I had to dumb myself down to fit into Hollywood. I also had to wear short-shorts and skimpy costumes on TV and pose in a sequined bikini to promote Too Close for Comfort.  

We are obsessed with sex in America in a very immature way. We have made something natural seem titillating and taboo because of our Puritan nature. Advertisers jumped on this, seeing the potential in creating a plot to keep women thin and insecure. I am not blaming men for all my problems, but they did invent makeup and war and high heels. Do you know the historical purpose of high heels?  To raise women up for easier insertion!  It's true! I'll tell you the history later.  

My son's friend Tommy, 14, came back from Europe this summer and said the people are so genuine there. He said they seem to value relationships more than "stuff" and looking "hot." My stepson is obsessed with having "cut abs" on Facebook. God Bless him. I have tried to tell him it's inner strength that matters, but he looked at me like I was an alien. 

I have been wondering if the greed era, circa 1980-2008, in which capitalism has been allowed to run amok -- is responsible for creating so many sociopaths and narcissists in our country. What are American values? What do we value?

Please post your opinion for an article I'm writing. Thank you.

More on my personal experiences with domestic violence angle in the next issue.

This was initially written in 2010

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DOMESTIC VIOLENCE "SAFE PASSAGE HOME" EVENT OCT. 2

Safe Passage provides extreme lifestyle makeovers to abused women and their children.




For Immediate Release

“Cut It Out” – Los Angeles Area Businesses to
Donate Free Makeovers to Domestic Violence Sufferers
Friday, October 2, 2009
Giuseppe Franco Salon

Beverly Hills CA- In honor of October being named National Domestic Violence Awareness Month (DVAM), the country’s best beauty experts and physicians have partnered up with Los Angeles based non-profit organization, Safe Passage, to provide complete makeovers to five local domestic abuse survivors. These businesses will join a national campaign designed to “cut out” domestic violence by offering victims a “new look” on life.


Author, actress and radio host Lydia Cornell will emcee the event, and introduce Trish Steele, the founder of Safe Passage and Women of Brilliant Achievement Honoree 2008.

DVAM is a time for collective action, to celebrate survivors of the Movement, raise public awareness, and remember the millions of lives lost, as a result of abuse. For many years, Safe Passage has sought to make a difference in the lives of Angelenos by providing amazing life transformations.

With these makeovers, Safe Passage is hoping to help heal the emotional and physical wounds these five women have endured. One woman is constantly reminded of the day her ex shot her by the appearance of a large scar where the bullet entered her shoulder. Another woman has burn scars that cover over fifty percent of her body. And still a third has significant facial scarring. These physical injuries are ever-present symbols of the past, which until recently, they relived every time they looked in the mirror.

For the last few weeks the women have undergone their own personal extreme makeovers, on the way to beginning their new lives. On October 2, 2009 between the hours of 12 and 2 PM, these women will finish the last phase of their new transformations at the Giuseppe Franco Salon in Beverly Hills.

To help with these dramatic makeovers, Safe Passage assembled a Dream Team of volunteers. Board-Certified Cosmetic Surgeon Dr. Fardad, founder of Beverly Hills Cosmetic Surgical Group, and Dr. Bruce Vafa of Smile Angels of Beverly Hills, donated multiple cosmetic, reconstructive and dental surgeries. Actress and exercise coach, Natalie Raitano will be providing ongoing fitness training and maintenance; Giuseppe Franco will provide haircuts and color on the day of the event; and makeup artist Ruby Polanco of NYX Cosmetics will be doing participants’ makeup. Finally, fashions donated by “2 Chicks” will style their new looks. The Miss California Latina and Miss Teen will be inspiring the ladies to walk the walk and talk the talk!

Following these makeovers, the women will be feted and reintroduced to the world at a luncheon given in their honor at Beverly Hills restaurant, Mulberry Pizza Street. According to Keiara, “This is a dream come true and for the first time I know that I am loved. God has sent me Angels from Safe Passage to restore me!”

The experts are equally enthusiastic about the opportunity. “I am honored to work with Safe Passage, and the other volunteers in participating in this life-changing event. These beautiful women have taught us more than we can ever teach them. I cannot wait to see their big reveals,” says Dr. Fardad.

Interested community members can do their part to stop domestic violence by contributing tax deductible donations like: gift certificates, beauty aids, laptop computers and money to Safe Passage or domestic abuse prevention charities like it.

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About Safe Passage

Mrs. Steele was a successful model, makeup artist, and wardrobe stylist in the entertainment industry for over 25 years and is now Founder of “Women Crowned In Glory, Inc. a non-profit organization and Safe Passage that is helping women of domestic violence to regain a “New Life”. Before the hit show “Extreme Makeover”, Trish was already performing extreme makeovers on survivors of domestic abuse. Her organization provides shelter, job replacements, makeovers and their own place to live. In addition, Trish is a survivor of domestic violence and has overcome countless hardships and overwhelming handicaps of hearing and speech impairment as a child.

Trish has achieved so much in her life through her perseverance to make a difference in her life and others around her; winning the 1987 California Gold Coast Pageant, 1st Runner up of Beauties of America, published her own book entitled “The Compelling Life Changing Stories of 12 Women”, and formed a non-profit charity (WCIG) to inspire women worldwide. She also has received recognition and awards from various groups; Southern California Motion Picture Council, Beautiful People Awards, LA Family Housing, Tolucan News, Celebrity Society Magazine, L.A. Times, Studio City Sun, Amazing Woman’s Advocacy, and honored by Council Members of Los Angeles Dennis Zine and Wendy Greuel.

Trish Steele is a real social entrepreneur who is extremely motivated, with a pure heart and turning dreams into reality and insecurities into self-assurance. Her cable talk show had won 2 “Angel Awards”, which she hosted and interviewed women and men who shared their stories of the miracles in their life. Today she is working toward her goals to establish the “Stepping Stones To A New Life Program” in all of the shelters in the Los Angeles area and a TV Series about Safe Passage.

"We suffer & go through catastrophes so we can understand the suffering of others. We are here to help & love each other." Lydia Cornell