Monday, November 04, 2019


I was a radioactive drinker and there were times of suicidal depression. I've struggled with low self-esteem, terrifying demons, inability to finish projects, procrastination, self-loathing, fear and the lust for fame. But after a chain of events that can only be described as ‘miracles,’ my biggest downfall turned out to be my greatest gift.

I've spoken about this in recovery circles, and often stopped to wonder ‘how did these seemingly miraculous events happen?’ There was one common element: SURRENDER. When I gave up fighting (and worrying), the outside picture changed. But what is the metaphysics of surrender? How did an inner change affect an outer result? By letting go and tapping into an unsuspected inner resource, I’ve had healings that are beyond human understanding, even major financial ones. I’ve finally figured how to recreate the mind-set necessary to activate these events. What appear to be miracles are actually natural laws according to Quantum Physics. Our loving attention to something literally alters the physical universe. It’s hard to talk about these things because they appear to exist in the realm of the magical. But they are real and everyone has access to them, they just don’t pay attention or take them seriously — and that makes all the difference. As Einstein said, “No problem can be solved on the same level it was created on.” In other words, you can't fight fire with fire; you can't cure alcoholism with more alcohol or drugs; you can’t go to war to create peace — you have to go to a higher level — a spiritual or diplomatic solution. Or as George Carlin put it, “Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.”

The mainstream media rarely mentions the vital, mysterious spiritual element of 12-step programs. And no one asks the root question: why are so many celebrities either dead or in rehab? What breed of person comes to Hollywood seeking the adoration of strangers? Wanting to be famous is an American malaise. With all due respect to Dr. Pinsky, shows like Celebrity Rehab seem dangerously self-conscious. How can a person heal when he’s playing to the camera? “You can’t save your ass and your face at the same time." - Lydia Cornell

Our society rewards glitz, glamour, competition, obsession with winning and achieving. We never allow young artists to fail and you must be allowed to write, paint and sing badly in order to grow.

“It’s not enough to put down the drug or drink; once you put down the ‘spirits’ you have to fill the void with true spirit, and lasting peace.  You have to go out in the world and live your life with joy."

I found my precious brother’s body after his drug overdose. I, too, have struggled with low self-esteem, demons and the lust for fame. But I would not be alive nor would I have been able to raise children if I hadn't gotten sober 25 ears ago by giving up my self-will and surrendering to a power greater than myself. This is the easier, softer way. Once you stop struggling, everything becomes so calm and sweet. It’s like plugging into an electric socket: once you lean on a power greater than yourself, you have more power. The creative force of love which I call God really exists and is always ready to take care of us completely when we stop resisting. Then we have true power.
You have to take the leap of believing that the Universe, your higher Power, love, God or whatever you want to call it, exists. Then the magic happens.

The creative force that sustains the universe is interactive; it needs our participation. In fact, it can’t exist in our lives without our consent, belief, faith or interaction. It needs playmates. It needs to express itself through us. More and more I’m beginning to believe what Elizabeth Gilbert said in her Ted Talks on Genius -- that  there are no individual geniuses. Mozart, Beethoven, Einstien... we are all just transcribers of creative consciousness – we are taking down God’s thoughts. Some are expressing God through music, some through art, some through writing and poetry and movies, some through comedy, some through tragedy, some through cooking, planting and growing, some through design, building, teaching, science, discoveries. 
What is the point of gaining the whole world if you lose your soul?  After all the years of struggling to make it — to find true love, to be rich, to have a happy family with a lagoon pool and water-slides, to live my dreams in a hammock in Maui — I’ve come to the conclusion that there is only one urgent need of mankind: to find God. But I’m not talking about the kind of “god” you may be thinking of — the kind that divides and judges. I thought I was too hip to believe in God and used to wonder if I find God canl I still have a sex life? I’m talking about unconditional love and an inner peace that is unshakable. 

The word God has become so political and dirty and misunderstood, I’m embarrassed to use it. I feel guilty about being embarrassed, and I’m not even Catholic. Or Jewish. (This is a joke, as in "Jewish or Catholic guilt."All I know is, no human power was able to lift me out of my suicidal despair. The God I’m talking about has no religion attached – no rules, dogma, yarmulkes, pointy bishops hats, long velvet robes, crystals, coins, rosaries, bows toward Mecca or steps to the left. No long, memorized prayers or deciphering of archaic doctrines. Only redemption. 

I have had astonishing results from prayer. I know that prayer actually changes things in the physical universe. But the kind of prayer I’m talking about does not involve begging some anthropomorphic being who rules by fear and punishment. It involves letting go of your fears and worries and truly surrendering them to a loving higher power, whatever your own concept of this is. Substituting your worries with Divine Love, the power of the universe. God is love. It is really that simple. I had to get my intellect out of the way and surrender my doubts first. Then I quietly screamed HELP!

 Addiction is the disease of our time. Alcohol is the number one drug of choice among teens in America, and girls ages 10-15 have the lowest self-esteem and highest rate of suicide attempts of any other group. Add to this the fact that over 85% of violent crime is alcohol and drug related, and we have an epidemic — yet this is rarely mentioned in media reports.

~ Lydia Cornell  Luv xo 11:11

Originally written in 2012: Rest in peace Whitney Houston. You are soaring with the angels now. And as someone posted on Twitter, "another voice was added to Heaven's Choir."  Addiction, suicide, depression are all spiritual maladies that can be corrected by the power of Divine Love. And life is eternal; there is no death. Michael Jackson, Don Cornelius, Elvis, Marilyn, Jimmy Hendrix, Janis, Jim Morrison, River Phoenix, the list goes on... Let's wipe out this strange disease and help our children's generation wake up to the Truth of Being, Light and Love. xo

Cats Dancing on Jupiter cast 

Lydia Cornell, David Faustino at Chiller in New Jersey